I

I,I, I, wow a lot about how I feel!  Who really cares how I feel?  Well I guess I do?  I have done really good so far!  I am proud of myself!  Even though things are pretty crazy around here I am making better choices.  I hope I continue that this weekend I have a wedding shower to go to and a pampered chef party.  Food Food and more food!!!  Oh my!   I can do this I have done this I will do this!  So far I have used the word I 17  19 times!  WOW!  So do we have to think about ourselves when we are trying to lose weight? You betcha!  We have to focus on what we need for once.  What we have to do for ourselves!  That is hard for me some of us to do!  We take care of others don't we?  Isn't that our job?  We let ourselves go because we are so worried about taking care of others.  Why???  Is it because we don't like ourselves?  So its easier to take care of others!  Maybe if we are forces to focus on us we cant handle it?  I thinking about most of my life except when I lost a lot of weight I didn't care about buying myself clothes because I didn't care how I looked.  I bought stuff for my kids but not me!  Well my kids are grown so whats my excuse now?  I missed out on a lot of things over my life time because I didn't have the desire or energy to do them.  I don't want to miss out on anything else.  I'm not getting any younger.  Today is the day now is the time I have to change things.  My granddaughter will be 3 in less then 2 weeks.  I had made up my mind I was going to lose weight before my grand-baby got here.  Did I do it yea about 20 #  big whoop!  I have a long way to go still.  Then when she lost her other Grandmother yea now I really need to do this I'm the only Grandma she has left.  Have I done it NO!  Why?  I don't know and that's what this blog is about finding out what my prior mistakes were.  How to fix them.  How to not keep making the same mistakes again.  Can I do it?  Will I do it?  I have never gone all the way!  I want to go all the way this time.