They say slow and steady wins the race!?

I'm still in the race!?  I'm still in the race!?  Me?? I'm still running.  It does seem to be slower then I would prefer but I think I'm OK with that??  But........ sometimes I'm not!  I want to get this blubber off faster.
I know I know I didn't get this way overnight!  But I'm still in the race.  That's so unlike the old me!  Is part of me afraid I won't once again finish the race?  I have tried so many times before and haven't even stayed in it this long.  So that must be a good thing right?  Does a leopard change its spots?  I don't know I hope so?  I'm getting ready to leave work so I will have to continue this later.

Well we will see.......................................


Just saw that this is my 100th post! Yay!

I am changing my thinking!

I have decided to put my relationship with food on the back burner. Food you will no longer be my best friend!! I will not turn to you when I'm down or when I'm happy!! You are no longer an award for my achievements. You will no longer be what I think about in the morning. You will no longer be the last thing I do at night! You will strictly be on a need to live basis. I need you to live. But I will no longer live for you!! I have replaced you with something much stronger then you, more loving then you, more forgiving then you!! I have replaced you with God! The one who loves me, who takes care of me, the one who gave me life! He is who I will turn to for all my joy, my sorrow, my pain, my inadequacies. So don't think that I will change my mind and go back to you! There's a new Sheriff in town and your history!!!! I needed to get that out there so there's no more questions!! It's done! I have taken back my life and I intend to keep it this time!

I want to live like there's no tomorrow!

I'm constantly quoting songs but its what speaks to my heart on the way to work! Love it! Live it! Here is my song for today!

Hold on
Is this really the life I'm living?
Cause I don't feel like I deserve it
Every day that I wake, every breath that I take you've given
So right here, right now
While the sun is shining down

I wanna live like there's no tomorrow
Love like I'm on borrowed time
It's good to be alive, yeah

Hold on
If the life that we've been given
Is made beautiful in the living
And the joy that we get brings joy to the heart of the giver
Then right here, right now
This is the song I'm singing out

I wanna live like there's no tomorrow
Love like I'm on borrowed time
It's good to be alive
[X2]

I won't take it for granted
I won't waste another second
All I want is to give you
A life well lived, to say "thank you"

I wanna live like there's no tomorrow
Love like I'm on borrowed time
It's good to be, it's good to be alive

I wanna live like there's no tomorrow
Love like I'm on borrowed time
It's good to be alive

I won't take it for granted
I won't waste another second
All I want is to give you
A life well lived, to say "thank you"

Today I'm thanking and praising The Lord for doing what he has done for me and the extra time I will have with my family. AND my new grand baby that's on the way! Yay!!!

Hungry day??

For some reason I have been hungry today. I'm sure it's because it's so slow at work and idle hands want to eat!! Luckily I managed to eat low calorie stuff and still came in under my target! I know the only way I'm going to reach my goal of 100# list this year is to exercise way more! Unfortunately I haven't been motivated to do that since I haven't been able to walk because of my knee. So now I have lost the desire to do so! I did go for a walk today at work. I thought about going again when I got home but I needed to run a few errands after work and picked up some dinner. When I finished dinner it was already 8 and really dark and probably pretty cool also!? After I get off tomorrow I have a bible study class won't be home till 8:30-9 so tomorrow is out too!! I don't know why I can't be happy with how far I have come?? Why do I need to put extra pressure on myself?? It's like my head want to sabotage my heart? I am going to have to work on that! Take it one day at a time! Today was a good day I will take that and be happy!

Today is the day!

Not sure what that means but it's what popped on my head! It's a song I hear on the radio. Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won`t worry about tomorrow
I`m trusting in what You say
Today is the day.

That's how I feel I didn't do too well yesterday. And of course the scale reflected that today but I'm not going to beat myself up in just going to so better today! I changed my fitness pal again. I started out at 2# per week changed it to 1.5#. And now I'm back to 2#. So I was way over yesterday after I changed! I'm on a mission and the only way to get there is to buckle down! So here I go!

2012 Graves Mountain Apple Festival

We had a great time yesterday. It was a nice day! Lots and lots of walking!!

I would love to be under 200# by the end of 2012!

What and amazing year it would be if I could do that! I already have been very successful this year much better then most almost 60 lbs since April. I have been convincing myself that there is no rush. No reason to push your self harder then you have to. You didn't get this way overnight so...... But.... Now I know for sure I'm going on the cruise in feb and it would be soooooooooo awesome to be under 200 lbs I need to lose another 41 lbs that doesn't seem realistic does it?? I lost the first 50 in four months and I'm finally on a roll again. My appetite has decreased significantly. I started walking again last week but then my knee started bothering me and haven't been able to walk this week. I'm so excited to be where I am right now mentally, physically and spiritually. I'm just going to see how it goes. Every other time in my life that I have wanted to lose a lot of weight for I was never very successful. This time I have actually done it!! Living and loving life again! :)

I am so excited today!!

I have finally worked my way through my second plateau. I have lost more weight this week then I have in the last month!! I am so glad I have stuck it out this long! What a awesome feeling knowing that I can and have changed my life for good!!?? The other day my husband actually told me he doesn't think I will ever go back to the way I was!! That meant a lot to me! I don't ever want to go back to that. I know that I would have never been able to do this without Gods help. I'm not strong enough on my own!!

I will do this!

I was thinking yesterday about how I have done so many things different this time! So many things I never did the last time. I know that I learn more stuff every journey I take. One thing I have never done that I want to do this time. I want to buy smaller pants and have to buy more smaller pants!! Uh what?? Yea every other time I have lost weight and bought smaller pants I get comfortable in my new size and don't end up losing more weight. This time I want to grow out of the two new pants I bought but the right way this I want them to be too big for me too!! I'm still very motivated and I'm going to do it!! My cruise is back on for feb and I have a feeling even tho I would have preferred the reason not be my dad got stomach cancer be the reason I didn't go. I am glad we didn't go because I will be a lot smaller then I would have been this feb!! So I'm really on a mission!!

I have been doing this for longer then I ever have!

I realized yesterday I have been at this for 6 months. That I a record for me. Usually by now I would have taken the "break". Because I lost 50 lbs. I deserve a break!! Well I didn't let that stop me. I have slowed down and I have only lost 55lbs. I say only!! That's crazy. Why do I continue to sell myself short?? That's a lot of weight. I would prefer it be more at this point. I have to be satisfied with how far I've come the fact that I'm still going. Counting my calories everyday. I really believe dare I believe?? Yes I believe I'm actually going to do it this time. Do you have any idea how it feels to put on a pair of jeans that I couldn't wear 6 months ago and by the end of the day if I wasn't wearing a belt they would be in the floor?? It feels amazing! Life is amazing thru these rose colored glasses. But really I feel like I'm living again. Everything is so much easier. I'm happy I still have a very long way to go but at least I have a pretty good head start on my journey to destination healthy!!